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05-Sep-2019 18:50 by 9 Comments

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There are many anecdotal and quantitative indications that sex among millennials is a real landmine for hurt and misunderstanding.In some ways, this hurt is heightened by the advent of distancing technologies like Tinder and texting.

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I generally jump to the defense of millennials, not just because I am one, but because I even know some.OK, a couple of disclaimers before you pillory the argument: I’m not a “younger millennial.” If millennials are defined as those who are 19 to 35 years old in 2016, then at 29 I clock in on the “What are the young people up to these days? So, younger young people, weigh in in the comments please and tell me what I’m missing; I’m all ears.Second disclaimer: I believe that everyone should have exactly as much sex as they do or don’t want to have, with whomever they do or don’t want to have it, in whatever fashion they do or don’t want to have it.It too often feels as though we’re reported on as an alien species: “I saw this strange person at the supermarket buying organic milk.He was ungrateful, stupid and has never worked a day in his life, if my personal inference from watching him hold the carton may be used as a categorical analysis of an entire generation, as it will be throughout this piece, and then again in the comments section.”But if (and this is a big “if”) this is indeed how many millennials think about sex, relationships and other people — as productivity inhibitors — we’re screwed, in all ways but the fun one.It continues by being a receptive and respectful person. The emotional work that sex asks us to do is the same emotional work a life of growth requires.

The decision to indefinitely avoid sexual relationships from a place of fear is deeply understandable.

For example, the use of antidepressants, which doubled between 19, can reduce sex drive. Those who take antidepressants: Good on you for getting the help you need.

Those who don’t: Find a way to understand and support flesh-and-blood humans dealing with depression.

Here’s a generation swearing off a life-affirming and life-creating act in record numbers, simply because they don’t know what to do with it.

Most people are rational actors, in so far as their fears are connected to their experiences.

So here are my thoughts in brief on points made in the Washington Post article (edited here for clarity).

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